Chapter 3 - THE EMPTY CHAIR|
The next morning, the hospital room was filled with flowers.
Rachel had brought white roses. Melissa had arranged a small blanket beside my bed. Someone from the hospital's bereavement team had left a booklet about grieving parents.
There was still no Owen.
At nine, my mother called.
“Natalie, sweetheart, I heard about the baby.”
I closed my eyes.
“Mom.”
“Oh, darling. I don't even know what to say. Your father and I are devastated.”
I waited for her to ask whether I was all right.
Instead, she said, “Brooke is absolutely crushed. She's been crying all morning.”
I opened my eyes.
“Brooke?”
“Yes. She feels terrible that the wedding was happening while you were going through this. You know how sensitive she is.”
I stared at the window.
“Mom, I gave birth last night.”
“I know, sweetheart. I know. We're trying to figure out how to manage everything. The wedding is in two days, and people are already arriving.”
I didn't answer.
“Maybe once you're home, you could talk to Brooke. She feels like you've been distant.”
I almost laughed.
My daughter had been born without a heartbeat, and somehow I was being asked to comfort the person whose wedding rehearsal my husband had chosen over her.
“I'm tired, Mom.”
“Of course. Rest. We'll visit soon.”
She hung up.
Rachel took the phone from my hand.
“I'm going to say something, and I don't want you to defend them.”
I looked at her.
“You don't owe anybody an explanation for being devastated.”
I began to cry again.
At noon, Owen finally arrived.
He wore the same dark suit from the rehearsal dinner. His hair was neatly styled, and there was a small white flower pinned to his lapel.
He looked uncomfortable when he saw the hospital room.
“Hey.”
I didn't answer.
He placed a gift bag on the chair.
“I brought you something.”
I looked inside.
A box of expensive chocolates.
My throat tightened.
“You brought me chocolates?”
“I didn't know what else to get.”
Rachel stood.
“I'm going to get some coffee.”
She left, but I knew she hadn't gone far.
Owen sat beside the bed.
“I'm sorry I couldn't come last night.”
I looked at him.
“Did you see our daughter?”
He glanced toward the blanket folded at the foot of the bed.
“No.”
“Do you want to?”
His expression shifted.
“I don't think I could handle that.”
I turned my face away.
“I handled it.”
He reached for my hand.
I pulled it back.
“Don't.”
“Nat, please.”
“You were supposed to be there.”
“I know.”
“You were supposed to hold her.”
“I know.”
“You were supposed to say goodbye.”
He lowered his head.
“I couldn't leave Brooke in the middle of everything.”
I stared at him.
“Why was Brooke more important?”
“She was getting married.”
“And Lily was dying.”
He flinched.
“Don't say it like that.”
“Why? Does the truth make you uncomfortable?”
He stood and paced the room.
“I made a bad decision. I know that. But we can't keep destroying each other over one night.”
“One night?”
I looked at the empty chair.
“That chair was empty when I delivered our daughter. That's not one night, Owen. That's something I'll remember every time I think about her birthday.”
He sat again.
“Let's go home. We'll grieve together.”
I wanted to believe him.
Then his phone rang.
The screen showed Brooke's name.
He answered.
“Hey, sweetheart. What's wrong?”
I watched his face soften.
“Don't worry. I'll be there.”
He ended the call and looked at me.
“She needs help with the wedding arrangements.”
I stared at him.
“Then go.”
He hesitated.
“Are you sure?”
I looked down at the blanket.
“Yes.”
He left without kissing my forehead.
May you like
And when the door closed, I realized that the empty chair beside my bed had never really been empty.
It had been occupied by a man who simply wasn't there.
