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Chapter 1 - The Girl at the Top of the Stairs|

The maid told Norah to wait at the bottom of the stairs and not to touch anything.

Norah folded her hands over the folder on her lap. The folder was cardboard gone soft at the corners, and its torn edge had been mended with yellow tape that had browned where her thumb rested. Her blue dress had been repaired three times, and the stitches along the hem were neat because she had made them herself, at the kitchen table, under a lamp that flickered.

The hall was the size of her whole apartment. Marble floor, veined like something cut from a river. A staircase that curved up into the dark like a ribbon being pulled. Above her, a chandelier hung so low and so bright that she could see her own reflection in the polish of her shoes — and the thin line of glue holding the soles together.

Vivien Ellery sat in a chair by the stairs with a cup of tea balanced on her knee. She looked at Norah the way a woman looks at a stain on a rug.

This is the candidate? she asked the maid, as though Norah were furniture.

Norah Bellamy, Norah said, and stood. Thank you for seeing me.

Vivien opened the folder without asking. She turned the pages with two fingers, as if they might be dirty. No degree. No agency. No references worth the paper. She turned another page. You were a nanny for the Delaneys?

Yes. Two years.

The Delaneys pay late. Everyone knows that. Vivien's eyes went down, unhurried, to Norah's shoes. A small laugh escaped her, more breath than sound. And secondhand shoes. Did you think this was a charity house?

One of the staff by the wall covered her mouth. Norah felt heat climb her throat, but she kept her hands still and her voice level. She had practiced this voice. She had practiced it in the mirror, in the hospital corridor, in the bus shelter with the wind cutting through her coat.

I know I don't have much to show on paper, she said. But I love children, and I work hard, and I would be grateful for a chance.

Grateful won't raise an Ellery.

Norah thought of the bill on her kitchen table, folded under the sugar bowl. Four thousand eight hundred dollars. Due in seven days. She thought of her mother's hand on the blanket, thin as paper, and she held on to her dignity the way a woman holds a rope over water.

A door opened above them.

Marcus Ellery came to the railing of the upper hall. He was thirty-five and looked older that morning, his tie already loosened, his eyes carrying the flat exhaustion of a man who had slept in his office again. He did not look at Norah for more than a second.

Vivien, I have five minutes, he said. We're almost done.

I don't think this one is right.

Beside Marcus, a small figure appeared.

She wore a yellow dress with a white collar. She held a stuffed rabbit by one ear, and the other ear was missing, the seam furred with age. She came down four steps and stopped, exactly halfway, and looked at the floor.

This is my daughter, Marcus said, almost to himself. She has not spoken a word in a year.

The hall went soft with sadness. The maid looked at her feet. Vivien's jaw tightened. Nobody moved, because there was nothing to move toward.

But Norah was not looking at the floor. She was looking at Lily.

The girl was not staring down the way a child stares when she is lost inside her grief. She was watching Norah's mouth. Then her hands. Then her face, and back to her mouth again, quick and hungry, the way a person reads a book in a language she almost knows. Norah's chest went tight. She had seen that look before. She had grown up inside it.

.....................................

Norah slowly lifted her right hand.

She did not wave. She did not beckon Lily closer.

Instead, she placed two fingers against her own lips, then touched her chest, and finally opened her palm toward the little girl.

It was a simple gesture.

A silent greeting.

Lily's fingers tightened around the rabbit.

Marcus noticed the movement.

"What are you doing?"

Norah lowered her hand.

"Nothing, sir. I didn't want to frighten her."

Vivien gave a disapproving sigh.

"She's already frightened. That's the problem."

Norah looked at Lily again.

"No, ma'am. I don't think she's frightened of me."

Vivien's eyebrows rose.

"And what exactly makes you qualified to decide that?"

"Nothing yet."

The honesty seemed to irritate her more than an argument would have.

Marcus descended two steps.

"Lily, come inside."

The girl didn't move.

Norah noticed that Lily's lips parted slightly, but no sound emerged. Her breathing changed whenever someone spoke directly to her. It became shallow, almost hurried.

Norah knew that pattern.

She had watched her younger brother struggle with a similar reaction after a childhood accident. Doctors had called it selective mutism, but the diagnosis had never explained everything. The fear of being forced to speak had become almost as powerful as the original fear itself.

Norah did not know whether Lily had the same condition.

She only knew that the child needed someone to stop demanding words from her.

"May I ask her something?" Norah asked.

Marcus looked at his mother.

Vivien laughed.

"She isn't going to answer you."

"I'm not asking her to."

Norah reached into her folder and removed a small folded piece of paper.

She placed it on the floor.

Then she stepped back.

On it was a drawing of a little rabbit with two enormous ears.

Lily stared at it.

For several seconds, nothing happened.

Then the little girl descended one step.

Marcus straightened.

"Lily?"

Norah raised one finger gently, asking him to wait.

Lily descended another step.

She stopped beside the drawing, looked at Norah, and slowly crouched.

Her tiny hand reached toward the paper.

Then, for the first time in twelve months, Lily made a sound.

It was barely audible.

A breath.

A tiny, uncertain whisper.

"Rabbit."

Marcus went completely still.

Vivien's teacup slipped against its saucer.

And Norah realized that the entire household had been waiting for the wrong thing.

May you like

They had been waiting for Lily to speak.

Nobody had thought to ask whether she had been trying to tell them something all along.

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